The System-Changer Sleepover

Peer support for humanitarian women

who care about workforce wellbeing

25-27 October 2024 | Caux Palace, Switzerland

The Challenge

Humanitarian women are burning out left and right. They’re struggling, they’re stuck, they’re spinning their wheels. They’re witnessing world events, trying to hold back tears, fear, and rage.
They’re drowning in tasks, a majority of which don’t seem to be valued or effective.
They’re trying to salvage personal relationships strained by long hours of work, travel, rotation, and deployments.
They’re skipping their physical therapy appointments to attend pointless work meetings or their parent-teacher reunions.
They’re waking up at night after dreaming about a difficult boss or experiencing hot flashes.
They’re rolling their eyes as they watch colleagues form high-school-style cliques, hoping they don’t get targeted next.
They’re wondering: why am I here, again? I signed up to help people in crises, but I spend most of my time stuck in a sticky web of red tape, bad management, and toxic culture.
With all the talk about localisation and de-colonization, many are questioning their life’s choices.
If their post hasn’t been cut, they’re debating between quitting or going on medical leave. If they have these options.
They’re turning to food, wine, Netflix, shopping – anything that can bring relief.
When they finally realize they need help, they don’t know who to call.
And it’s risky to reveal vulnerability in an era of cut-throat competition and cutbacks.
They often blame themselves.

But it’s not their fault.

The humanitarian system isn’t working well for the people it serves or the people who serve. Humanitarians are 2-3 times more likely than the general population to experience burnout, mental illness, and hazardous coping mechanisms (like alcoholism). Women and people from historically disadvantaged groups are especially at risk.

Even more so when they’re taking care of children or elderly parents, separated from their partner or other support, battling an illness, or struggling with other life challenges.

Enter the system changer

Some humanitarians stop.

They pause, reflect, study, learn, heal.

They decide to show solidarity in a different way than before: by supporting the people who support the people.

This might be at the individual level: mentoring, coaching, counselling, therapy, and courses.

It might be at the organizational level: HR, staff care, DEI, ethics, learning and development, organizational culture, consulting.

It might be with formal power holders: leaders, governing board members, funders.

It might be cross-sector: convening networks, facilitating processes, writing books, hosting events, publishing podcasts, and campaigning.

It might be behind the scenes: supporting community-based actors take the lead.

All of these, together, are needed to change our humanitarian system.

But none of these are sustainably promoted, prioritized or funded.

Leaving system changers feeling lonely, lost, and low impact.

I’m not okay with that.

Hi there. I’m Melissa.

I've been building cross-sector humanitarian coalitions since 2001, beginning with support for Afghan refugee returns.

I burned out in 2018 after working on a campaign called Less Paper More Aid and “The Grand Bargain” on humanitarian financing.

I had to stop working for 5 months.

I felt like a terrible colleague, a bad wife, and a failure as a mother.

Luckily, several women helped me recover and discover ways to prevent it from ever happening again.

Since then, I’ve spoken to hundreds of women working in the humanitarian world who are struggling or know someone who is.

And I’ve been inspired by many, many women who are contributing in their own ways to make things better.

It kills me every time one of their initiatives “sunset” due to lack of funding and political support.

I believe they should be getting more visibility, more respect, and more resources to support our workforce.

I’ve shared this in reports I co-authored (e.g. Working Well, Leading Well, Governing Well, and Funding Well) and the Embodying Change podcast.

I’ve convened cross-sector conversations about this at AidEx, the Humanitarian Networks and Partnerships Weeks (HNPW), CHS Alliance gatherings, the Humanitarian Human Resources conference and others.

And in February 2024 - after serving as in a donor role for 10 years, and in an NGO role for 10 years - I started a company called Facilitating the Future, Ltd.

I did this because I want to:

focus on my purpose (ending humanitarian burnout),
dedicated to the people I want to serve (humanitarian system changers),
using my skill set (cross-sector collaboration and content curation),
in the ways that I enjoy (fun experiential learning, peer support and collective action).

I’m confident that, together, we can create a path, process, time, and space for cross-sector collaboration to end burnout in the humanitarian world.

We can demonstrate a quality of solidarity that is trust-based and aligned to values like compassion with accountability and solidarity with equity.

We can go from feeling lost, lonely and low impact to guided, connected and respected.

Connection is the answer

Let’s unplug from all the things competing for our attention – our work, our families, our Instagram accounts.

Let’s go somewhere peaceful, beautiful and out of the way.

Let’s reconnect to ourselves: what do we care about, what’s exciting us, what’s working for us, what’s holding us back, where do we need help?

Let’s connect as peers.

Let’s compare notes, share strategies and encourage each other.

Let’s go to the mountains and enjoy the view.

Let’s make space for the magic that comes when we spend time together as HUMAN humanitarians who eat together.

Learn together, Laugh together. Rest together.

I discovered a place that’s perfect for this

When my former boss, Ignacio Packer, moved into a leadership role at the Caux Initiatives of Change, I immediately asked him for a tour of Caux Palace.

This is a venue with history. It’s beautiful. It’s not too far from Geneva, but just far enough away to get “out of the bubble.”

It’s aligned to my values (as it promotes inner development and hospitality). It’s available the weekend after AidEx, which brings humanitarians to Geneva from all over the world.

And Ignacio’s support team is fantastic and ready to welcome us.

What’s included

Introducing the system-changer sleepover

The system-changer sleepover is a cross between a ladies’ weekend retreat, a strategy consultation, and a nature get-away.

I’m inviting women who’ve worked for NGOs, the UN, governments, academia and independently and who care about the humanitarian workforce and want to connect with other who feel the same.

You’ll re-connect to yourself, your purpose and to nature with some encouragement from women who get what you’re going through.

Register now for CHF 1290

Friday, 25 October Starting at 18:00

Welcome apero

Tour of Caux Palace

Session 1 Connection over dinner

Saturday, 26 October

Breakfast

Session 2: Inspiration - Tour of Rochers-de-Naye

Lunch at Le Coucou

Session 3: Peer support

Break

Session 4: Collaboration

Dinner

Sunday, 27 October

Ending at 14:00

Breakfast

Session 5: Capacity sharing

Break

Session 6: Action planning

Lunch

Session 7: Closing reflection

Event Terms and Conditions

Price

This includes

A facilitated program beginning at 18:00 on 25 October and ending at 14:00 on 27 October
A private room with a view of Lake Geneva and the Alps for two nights
Food (dinner Friday night, all your meals on Saturday, and breakfast and lunch on Sunday) transportation during your stay
A guided tour of the Caux Palace and a mountain walking tour of Rochers-de-Naye (weather permitting).

What’s Not Included:

Early arrival accommodation (October 24th): An additional CHF 115 for bed & breakfast if you wish to arrive a day early. The venue requests that attendees ideally arrive before 8 PM.
Early arrival or late departure lunch or dinner: On-site dining is limited after 7 PM to vending machines. For a wider range of dining options, you can take a train into Montreux.

Spots are limited

During the school year, Caux Palace hosts a Hotel Management School for young people, so there are only a limited number of rooms available to us. And 25 October is right around the corner. Act fast to secure your spot now!

Next steps

We’re very lucky to have Debra Peltz helping us out for this retreat.

Recently at Save the Children UK, she is the founder of the award-winning Cross Sector Wellbeing Forum and CollabWork Virtual Business Support.

She’ll be managing payment, registration and our logistical needs. Be sure to fill out the form to alert us to any dietary restrictions and mobility issues.

Contact: debra@collabwork.co.uk. www.collabwork.co.uk

You might be thinking…

I don’t have time for this. I’m too busy.

Sister, you’re the person who needs this THE MOST! Slipping away from your job and your private life for the weekend won’t create lifelong disruption or a horrendous backlog of unanswered e-mails. Take a break from cooking and caring for others and focus on yourself.

I don’t like to attend work events on weekends

This isn’t a “work” event. This is a community event that happens to include people who have complementary work interests.

Why should I pay to attend something like this?

Normally, gatherings are covered by donors or corporate sponsors. But they have other agendas. This weekend, YOU are the agenda. To keep it that way, each participant will cover their own costs (e.g. accommodation, food and program). It’s crowdsourced solidarity in action.

I’m not comfortable around people I don’t know.

Participation in this event will be intentionally small. There’s a limit to one woman per organization/ entity. We’ll have an introductory call on 17 October for you to get to know each other in advance.

I’m introverted. My energy is depleted in social settings.

All excursions are optional. If you prefer to hang out in your room and read a book or go on a solo walk instead, that is okay. This is YOUR TIME!

Every time I go to these kinds of gatherings, I get excited but then it all ends so abruptly and there’s no follow-up.

We’ll talk about options to continue learning and supporting each other after 27 October. But if you’d like to end the journey with us on 27 October, no problem

Discover the beauty of Caux, Switzerland

Overlooking Lake Geneva (Leman) and nestled above the charming city of Montreux, Caux Palace offers an inspiring and extraordinary setting for our event. Just 1 hour and 20 minutes from Geneva, this historic venue provides a tranquil retreat away from the everyday hustle and bustle.

About Caux Palace & Villa Maria

Caux Palace is part of the Caux Initiatives of Change, a Swiss private charitable foundation dedicated to fostering ethical leadership, human security, and sustainable living.

Originally a grand hotel, the Caux Palace now serves as a center for dialogue and transformation and is shared as a hotel school.Villa Maria, located within the Caux Palace complex, will be exclusively ours for sessions throughout the event

Getting to Caux Palace

The train journey from Geneva Airport and Geneva itself to Caux is straightforward, taking about 1 hour and 20 minutes, with a transfer at Montreux. Enjoy beautiful views of Lake Geneva and the Swiss Alps along the way. Trains run frequently, and Caux Station is conveniently located next to the palace.

Train Information:

Travel Time: 1 hour and 20 minutes
Fare: Affordable and varies by ticket class
Scenery: Stunning views throughout the rid

Weather in Late October

In late October, the weather in the Swiss Alps and around Montreux can be quite variable. Expect temperatures to range from 5°C to 15°C (41°F to 59°F). It can be chilly, especially in the mornings and evenings, so layering is key. Rain is possible, and higher altitudes like Rochers de Naye may experience cooler temperatures and occasional snowfall. Bring shoes that are comfortable for walking.

Have Questions?

We’re here to help! If you have any questions or need more information, feel free to reach out to us. You can contact us via email , and we’ll get back to you as soon as possible.

Melissa melissa@facilitatingthefuture.net

Debra debra@collabwork.co.uk

How do I know this is for me?

Are you a woman supporting the humanitarian workforce at one or more of these levels: individuals, teams, organizations or the system at large? Are you open to sharing your stories, experiences and ideas with others working in this space? Do you care about aligning our behaviours to values like compassion with accountability and solidarity with equity? If yes, then this is for you.

Can I bring a friend?

Yes of course. This would be way more fun with a friend. Send them this link to register for their own ticket. That way you can compare notes and make the most of your experience together.

Which airport should I fly to and from?

Geneva airport is a 1.5 to 2-hour train ride to Caux (with a train change in Montreux).

What's the dress code?

We want you to be comfortable. Bring your walking shoes!

What else can I do in the area?

Near Caux you can explore Château de Chillon, a historic castle on Lake Geneva.

The Lavaux Vineyard Terraces UNESCO World Heritage site provides stunning views and wine tasting opportunities.

Montreux’s promenade is lined with cafes and boutiques, perfect for leisurely strolls.

The Freddie Mercury Statue by the lakefront pays homage to the singer who recorded several albums in the town.

The Montreux Casino was rebuilt after a fire memorialized in the Deep Purple song "Smoke on the Water".